1. You're dealing with grief and regret over your last conversation, while frequently replaying the day's events.
2. You're fearful of forgetting precious moments, hence try hard to hold onto memories, adding to the fear are the recurring nightmares about the accident.
3. Lastly, you're trying to make sense of life without Alex, indulging in activities you shared, writing to him but feeling stuck in your grief, yet somewhere hope persists.